Retirement

Members writing in the style and using the characters of W.E.J. (Fan Fiction)

Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 12 Dec 2017, 23:15

This is my very first attempt at writing FanFic. And this "writing in the style of WEJ" - thing. :writing: Well, I don't think I quite managed that.... :doh: And no flying :pilot: and no action :scared: But it's got chocolate. And tea. Tea is important.
Please be gentle!! :twisted: :laughspit:


Retirement

It was another typical English autumn day. Wet and dreary. How these people could ever win
two world wars was beyond him. Maybe it was the weather that drove them abroad?
Better to fight in countries with superior climates than to live in this? He sneered to
himself.

As he was musing on the English mind, he was listening to footsteps coming up the main staircase in
the big anonymous apartment building he was living in. He didn't pay any particular heed,
the few people who visited him (mainly Bigglesworth) always used the lift.
These footsteps were rather interesting however. They were light and hesitant,
and the person, whoever it was, appeared to be stopping at every door on every landing before continuing up the next flight.
He heard no knocking and no voices so whoever it was didn't seem to be peddling anything.
He did not think the footsteps concerned him however, he was no longer a threat to anybody.

But his training made him pick up on anything out of the ordinary, and as the footsteps slowly
progressed up the many flights of stairs and got closer to him, he was intrigued in spite of himself.
As the footsteps halted in front of his door, he found himself holding his breath while he waited for
the footsteps to continue. They did not. However much he strained his hearing all he could hear was
the noises of the inferior heating and plumbing system. This time he did not sneer however, he was
too emerged in the mystery of the footsteps. He really was getting bored. He had to take up the
Times crossword he told himself, as he was trying to discern what was happening on the other side
of his front door.

In the end his cold nerves gave in to curiosity and he opened the door suddenly. Only narrowly
avoiding to hit a young woman in the face with it. The woman was as startled as he was,
standing with one hand lifted as if ready to knock and in her other hand holding a piece of paper.
She was looking from his face to the paper and back to his face, with a slightly deranged look in
her big luminous blue eyes. She was wearing a trench-coat and a rather incongruous man's fedora.
There was something eerily familiar about those eyes, but he pushed it to the back of his mind.
Now was not the time to reminisce about women's eyes.

Erich von Stalhein recovered quickly from his surprise, clicked his heels smartly together and bowed:

"I'm very sorry to have startled you, miss. How may I be of service?"

He expected her to be selling something: God? Encyclopædia Britannica? A revolutionary diet?

Instead she looked at him and said:

"Oh crikey, you must find me somewhat loopy but
by golly have I looked forward to meeting you!"

TBC
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 12 Dec 2017, 23:40

A very nice promising start, HC. My mind is seething we with conjecture already.
The Decision to Survive - A good pilot is both born and made. The best would look upon his work as a combination of adventure and a serious mission. – Major General Sir Frederick Sykes
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Re: Retirement

Postby Kismet » 12 Dec 2017, 23:53

This is very promising. Don't leave it long before you tell me more about what is going on. I don't do unsatisfied curiosity very well.
'Major Bigglesworth' said Von Stalhein coldly, 'there are times when I seriously wonder if you were created by the devil just to annoy me.'
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Re: Retirement

Postby OzBiggles1963 » 13 Dec 2017, 02:50

Marvelous stuff HC! Don't be hard on yourself, I really enjoyed the beginning [I have never written fanfic either, lol], but this has really got my curiosity "button" well & truly pushed. Thankyou, & I look forward to finding out more about young Erich's long lost...spoilers! :D ;)
They've been working together for so long that each seems to know by a sort of telepathy when another is in trouble. One never seems to get them together. Get one & the others come after him. To give the devil his due they make a formidable team.
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 08:54

Thank you all!! :oops: :D

I think that you'll be a bit surprised where this story ends up, I know I was.... :agiggle:

Haha it's funny how characters and stories decide for themselves :writing:
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 13 Dec 2017, 09:29

HostileCacti wrote:Thank you all!! :oops: :D

I think that you'll be a bit surprised where this story ends up, I know I was.... :agiggle:

Haha it's funny how characters and stories decide for themselves :writing:

Oh, yes. Our EVS has very often butted in where he shouldn't, much to my surprise.
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 09:50

*deep dramatic sigh* for some reason I can't do indentations after I copied and pasted into this adorable forum message-board :twisted: So the text I see got the real nice indentations I did in my text editor, but when I look at the posted version you see, there are none.... and I can't make any :cry: I can't figure it out....
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 09:54

Retirement
Part II


Even Erich von Stalhein had do admit to being slightly shaken by the unexpected events on
this ordinary dull Thursday. He looked nonplussed at the woman as she continued, rather wildly:

"I'm soooo sorry to trouble you at home. The mater would have an absolute fit. ...
But I know you are not a bad egg. Not really. ..."

"Excuse me"

He cut through her mass of words but his voice lacked its usual decisiveness:

"I'm sorry, miss, but ... I don't believe I know you?"

The young woman stopped her stream of consciousness conversation abruptly, then began anew:

"But oh my, haven't I introduced myself? How bally rude of me! It's like my friends
always say: you have no sense, that's what they say! You have no sense..."

Von Stalhein silently agreed with her friends and was beginning to wonder if the woman was on some kind
of drug. This was the 60s after all. No matter he told himself. I have more than enough
experience of extracting information. This woman should not prove to be a problem.
But she is English a small voice at the back of his mind reminded him. The English are different...

"Must be this infernal weather" he muttered to himself, as he heard the wind
rattle the windowpanes.

It was the woman's turn to look bewildered and she stopped her endless prattling:
"Did you say something, Hauptmann von Stalhein?"

He sighed and said:

"I do not have a housekeeper but times have changed. Would you care to come in for a drink?"

That she knew his name was startling but only to be expected.

"No chaperone", she chirped mischievously. "My goodness, mater would have a fit.
Oh golly the times really are a-changing...."

Von Stalhein was slightly worried that his mind was playing tricks on him. Surely this, this female
apparition could not be real? He stepped aside and showed her into his small but exquisitely
decorated drawing-room. He was nothing if not a good host. As Bigglesworth had experienced
on so many occasions he thought to himself, with a cynical smile.

"A sherry?" he queried in an uncertain tone.

"Oh no, please. My complexion cannot abide alcoholic beverages. ... You see,
my dear aunt Bessie once had a poodle who..."

Before he could find out about dear aunt Bessie's poodle and how its complexion could possibly have
anything to do with anything, he quickly excused himself and retreated into his small,
but well-designed kitchen. He had had new workbenches put in. German quality. He mostly dined out
but occasionally he entertained friends at home.

He still found something about the young woman eerily familiar. He usually had total recall
for faces but for some reason he couldn't place her. As he was trying to gather his thoughts
he set the tray with his tea set with the von Stalhein family crest. His sister had
somehow managed to salvage it for him. It was not a complete set but he rarely
needed a complete set these days. He was himself not an habitual tea drinker but upon
his move to London he had set about learning to brew the perfect tea in his usual efficient manner.

When he returned with tea and biscuits he found the young woman standing with her back towards him,
looking intently at an old photo he had had framed and put on the wall above his elegant writing desk.

When he entered the room she turned around and smiled a quirky grin. At that moment she rather
unexpectedly reminded him of a cat. As he made a mental note of her acute hearing, she said:

"Look, you are all together and in uniform too. How adorable! ...
You must tell me how it came about. Pleeeeease, I'm simply dying to hear the story."

Von Stalhein for a split second thought about reaching for his Luger and granting her wish but his
rational side told him he was overreacting.

TBC
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 13 Dec 2017, 10:00

HostileCacti wrote:
.. ... You see,
my dear aunt Bessie once had a poodle who..."


Getting slightly concerned here. This blue-eyed female sounds a lot like Bertie. :?

HostileCacti wrote: "Look, you are all together and in uniform too. How adorable! ...
You must tell me how it came about. Pleeeeease, I'm simply dying to hear the story."

Von Stalhein for a split second thought about reaching for his Luger and granting her wish but his
rational side told him he was overreacting.



Love this bit.
The Decision to Survive - A good pilot is both born and made. The best would look upon his work as a combination of adventure and a serious mission. – Major General Sir Frederick Sykes
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 10:12

Fairblue wrote:
HostileCacti wrote:
.. ... You see,
my dear aunt Bessie once had a poodle who..."


Getting slightly concerned here. This blue-eyed female sounds a lot like Bertie. :?


:crazypilot: :monocle: :snigger:

:lol: I have no idea what is going on....

Fairblue wrote:
HostileCacti wrote: "Look, you are all together and in uniform too. How adorable! ...
You must tell me how it came about. Pleeeeease, I'm simply dying to hear the story."

Von Stalhein for a split second thought about reaching for his Luger and granting her wish but his
rational side told him he was overreacting.



Love this bit.


Thank you :love: It was a lot of fun writing this. I have never had fictional characters come into my life like this before :lol: :doh:
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Spitfire666 » 13 Dec 2017, 10:36

HostileCacti wrote: "Look, you are all together and in uniform too. How adorable! ...
You must tell me how it came about. Pleeeeease, I'm simply dying to hear the story."

Von Stalhein for a split second thought about reaching for his Luger and granting her wish but his
rational side told him he was overreacting.

Enjoying this, HC. And don't worry about the indentations ;)
If there's one thing certain in this uncertain world it is that Algy won't go home without us.

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Re: Retirement

Postby kylie_koyote » 13 Dec 2017, 12:24

HostileCacti wrote:
Thank you :love: It was a lot of fun writing this. I have never had fictional characters come into my life like this before :lol: :doh:


I know exactly what you mean :love: Once they show up, it's decidedly difficult to get rid of them. I hope they tell you lots and lots more.

This is a great story!
"For goodness sake stop that Yankee drawl, or you'll have us all doing it before you've finished."
"OK baby - sorry - I mean, righto."
"That's better."
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Re: Retirement

Postby Tracer » 13 Dec 2017, 12:49

Yes indeed - don't keep us on tenterhooks for too long..... :nailbiting:
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Re: Retirement

Postby Kismet » 13 Dec 2017, 12:52

Who needs indentations? I haven't used them in years, although I do know when I should be, but failing to do so.

This is a very interesting female who has walked into Dear Old Erich's flat. I can't wait to find out who she is and what she wants.
'Major Bigglesworth' said Von Stalhein coldly, 'there are times when I seriously wonder if you were created by the devil just to annoy me.'
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 13:45

kylie_koyote wrote:
I know exactly what you mean :love: Once they show up, it's decidedly difficult to get rid of them. I hope they tell you lots and lots more.

This is a great story!


Yes, you have written lots of great stories :claphappy:

And you have been commenting for ages.... on this one :lol:

Let's see if I'm ever plagued by this kind of visitors again :twisted:
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 13:49

Kismet wrote:Who needs indentations? I haven't used them in years, although I do know when I should be, but failing to do so.

This is a very interesting female who has walked into Dear Old Erich's flat. I can't wait to find out who she is and what she wants.


Thank you, all of you! :D

I suppose the indentation thing isn't really important, but it's there.... it's just not visible to anyone but me. :? So infinitely annoying!!

She is strange indeed, this woman :twisted:
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 13:59

Retirement
Part III:


When he finally had her seated with a cup of tea she seemed to relax and make more sense to him.
Not much, but at least she was speaking coherently. Or maybe he was getting to understand her bizarre
personality? He shuddered slightly and told himself to focus on the task at hand.

"Thank you for inviting me in. My friends all say that you are a dear, really, deep
down."

"All of your friends?" he asked rather perplexed.

"Well, perhaps not all of them...." Her voice trailed off and she seemed lost in thought.

He knew that the best way to make someone talk was to make them feel comfortable and safe,
and so he didn't rush her. Sweet things was a necessity at these kinds of interrogations.
He had plenty of those. If she turned out to be like a certain Russian he would get
the box of Belgian chocolate he had in his cupboard, intended for his nephew's girlfriend.
He braced himself and wished he had laced his own cup with something much stronger than tea.

"Another biscuit?"

"Oh yes, rather! They are absolutely delicious. Did you bake them yourself?"

Her incredibly blue eyes were glittering but gave nothing away. Von Stalhein blanched slightly but
replied in a stiff tone:

"I do not bake biscuits. They are from a local German delicatessen."

She managed to keep her face straight for a few seconds than she exploded in giggles.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself." She giggled like a teenager. "You should have seen
your face."

Von Stalhein felt himself losing patience with the entire situation. He did not have time for this,
he was not that bored.

She seemed to sense this because she said:

"I am sorry, I really am. I just go too far sometimes. There are times when even Ginger looses
patience."

Von Stalhein stiffened noticeably.

"The young man with the difficult name, you are acquainted with him?"

He knew that none of them were young anymore but it was a habit, referring to him like that.

She looked slightly taken aback.

"But of course. Didn't I explain?"

TBC
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Kismet » 13 Dec 2017, 14:05

You're doing a really good job with this female who does everything except explain. I'm enjoying her.
'Major Bigglesworth' said Von Stalhein coldly, 'there are times when I seriously wonder if you were created by the devil just to annoy me.'
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 13 Dec 2017, 14:44

Kismet wrote:You're doing a really good job with this female who does everything except explain. I'm enjoying her.


Thank you!!

:lol: She's rather funny. It took ages before I could figure her out. Baffling creature :snigger:
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 13 Dec 2017, 14:53

I'm noting this, too and wondering where it is headed.
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Re: Retirement

Postby OzBiggles1963 » 13 Dec 2017, 14:55

Kismet wrote:You're doing a really good job with this female who does everything except explain. I'm enjoying her.


Ditto! Although I'm beginning to suspect she's secretly enjoying "torturing" poor Erich, judging from the mischievous twinkling in those blue eyes, lol. Hmmm, starting to remind me of someone... :D
They've been working together for so long that each seems to know by a sort of telepathy when another is in trouble. One never seems to get them together. Get one & the others come after him. To give the devil his due they make a formidable team.
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Re: Retirement

Postby kylie_koyote » 13 Dec 2017, 15:19

The idea of Erich baking, with a polkadot frilly apron, is something I shall treasure.
"For goodness sake stop that Yankee drawl, or you'll have us all doing it before you've finished."
"OK baby - sorry - I mean, righto."
"That's better."
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Re: Retirement

Postby Tracer » 13 Dec 2017, 17:59

kylie_koyote wrote:The idea of Erich baking, with a polkadot frilly apron, is something I shall treasure.



Worn over his breeches and boots of course. And the tunic with the Iron Cross and oak leaves.
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Re: Retirement

Postby OzBiggles1963 » 14 Dec 2017, 09:42

Tracer wrote:
kylie_koyote wrote:The idea of Erich baking, with a polkadot frilly apron, is something I shall treasure.



Worn over his breeches and boots of course. And the tunic with the Iron Cross and oak leaves.


Monocle affixed, with Prussian cigarette holder clamped nonchalantly between his teeth?? ;)
They've been working together for so long that each seems to know by a sort of telepathy when another is in trouble. One never seems to get them together. Get one & the others come after him. To give the devil his due they make a formidable team.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Tracer » 14 Dec 2017, 10:26

Tsk. Ash in the biscuits.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Wanderer » 14 Dec 2017, 11:37

HostileCacti wrote:Retirement
"But of course. Didn't I explain?"
[b]TBC

Please Please Please do! I'm on the edge of my seat here :-)

By the way I see your desired indents when I am using the edit function in "quote" mode but they disappear when posted. A quirk of the forum software, no doubt - anything "clever" I have tried to do with formatting has always ended up as "too clever by half"...
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'... Not always. Sometimes he catches a slug—in the back of the neck,' contradicted Biggles.
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 14 Dec 2017, 12:27

There is away to allow tabs but it is done at Admin level which means using an extension to create a BBCode. I daresay it could be done by VZ but it's not absolutely necessary. (Is it? :?)
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 14 Dec 2017, 12:51

Sorry about causing such distress and confusion :lol:

I thought everyone else used indentations, but I guess I've been too absorbed by people's stories when reading :booky: to notice that they don't :faint:

Real Life got in the way of posting for a while but the next bit is forthcoming. :roll:
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Re: Retirement

Postby HostileCacti » 14 Dec 2017, 14:15

Retirement
Part IV


She closed her eyes and leant back in her armchair. She was either thinking, or channelling her
spirit guide he decided and shuddered. He never felt more old than when confronted with the young.
He took the opportunity to actually look at her, now that she was quiet so he could focus.
She had removed her trench coat and placed a pink faux leather document holder on the floor next
to her. She was wearing an indecently short shift dress in bold pink with various ...
colour splashes, and thigh high white boots. He rubbed his temples as he felt his head starting
to ache. This was too much like Alice in Wonderland.

Suddenly she sat up straight and said:

"Sorry about the getup, I'm coming straight from work."

He felt his eyes widen a little and she laughed uproariously:

"Not that kind of work, silly". She hiccoughed a while before she managed to speak again.
"I'm a music journalist - I work at NME."

At first he was puzzled, than he nodded in recognition:

"New Musical Express" he said.

Not the sort of thing he would ever read of course, but he had been in
the intelligence business for far too long to stop now. He almost subconsciously absorbed all
information around him.

She smiled and nodded energetically.

"See, I knew you still had it!!" She said this very enthusiastically.

He winced and muttered "Donnerwetter!" under his breath.

Her smile broadened even more and he remembered her acute hearing.

"I am sorry." A genuine apology, appropriate behaviour when faced with adversity was vital.

She just shrugged and said:

"I'm a music journalist, remember".

He sighed deeply again, and decided to firmly take hold of the situation.
This charade had been going on long enough.

"I see" he said. Although he didn't see at all. "But what can I possibly do for you?"

She smiled again and took hold of her pink document holder and waived it around wildly.

"I have been waiting for you to ask that."

She opened it and removed a magazine boldly emblazoned with NME. She passed it to him and said:

"See there, on the cover." She pointed.
"That's my story. Right there" She pointed again.
"I talked to The Fairies - first!" She announced this very proudly.

Von Stalhein was certain he had never before met anybody who was more away with the fairies than this
woman. That she was actually talking to them didn't surprise him in the least.

"You don't understand!" she said in a accusatory tone.

No, he thought to himself, he didn't understand. If he wasn't so utterly disorientated
he would have sneered. He quickly rose, crossed the room to his drinks cabinet, and poured himself
a generous serving of vodka. He downed it in one go and felt slightly more himself.

"Now, Miss...." he began.

TBC
There's a difference between a bad man and a good man gone wrong, answered Biggles coldly, as he turned back into the hut.
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HostileCacti
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Re: Retirement

Postby Fairblue » 14 Dec 2017, 14:45

HostileCacti wrote:





"Now, Miss...." he began.


You can't stop there!! Miss who?
The Decision to Survive - A good pilot is both born and made. The best would look upon his work as a combination of adventure and a serious mission. – Major General Sir Frederick Sykes
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